No Boundaries....No Peace
Updated: May 17
I have been dodging writing and starting my blog. I thought of blogging long before I thought about running a small business. Mostly because: I always have something to say, and well of course the vanity in me thinks that all my thoughts are post worthy.
However, the bit of insecurity that lives in me was deathly terrified! Writing is tough work. I know there are a ridiculous number of blogs, but how many are noteworthy? How many are being read?
Know that most of my blogs will be about me and my day to day which I think could help someone in some way or form. However, I will be sure to make them tie in when possible to my services and small business on a general level. I hope to make you think, and dare I say it, even laugh occasionally. I am a spoken word poet, and while you may think that would instantly make me a good writer, I am here to tell you that’s far from the truth because no one reads my poems but me. So, my blog writing style will be a combination of random rants, list, and a touch of stats from time to time (the sociology grad in me). My post won't be perfect as I am not perfect. Which I am totally okay with. However, I like to write and hopefully you will love reading my post.
So here goes nothing (and by nothing, I mean everything) my first attempt will be a blog post about my biggest lesson of 2017!
Well, my lack of setting boundaries particularly which almost tanked my ship. I lacked them in every aspect of my life: friendships, relationships, and in my new business. I was a yes girl, and as much as people hate to hear “NO” no one likes a yes girl. I have learned that saying no is a large part of being the boss. It was hard for me in my personal life to say no which bled through in my business life. However, it costs me time and money to be nice all the time. I run a service-based business, and I thought if I said no I was leaving money on the table.
Sadly, I learned that I threw away money by being a yes girl! I gave away free time I can never get back and possibly missed out on dream clients willing to adhere to the rules. Not only that, I spent most days very stressed walking on eggshells for people who just wanted to take. I learned to say no in my personal life and lost friends in the process. At the end of 2017 I learned to say no to clients and even turn down some potential clients. Guess what? I have made new friends and nurtured old friendships with the extra time. I have also landed more paying clients that respect the process and my boundaries! Here is a list of achievable boundaries you can set that you may not have thought about. These are my top 3 things to be mindful of when setting boundaries.
1) Time drains
If it is draining your time and taking away from your focus. Sometimes we do this to ourselves. Don’t be afraid to put yourself in check sometimes too. I have an accountability partner for this.
2) Is it on the calendar?
Don’t do it if it’s outside of the time allotted for that client or outside of your contracted hours. Nowadays even my recreational activities go on my calendar. As cliché as it is, time is certainly money!
3) Know your worth
Another cliché that was hard for me to grasp. Rewards and freebies are different. I am not in this for money, however I do have bills. I gave away so much last year. Guess what? We all have bills, and your clients, friends, and family should understand that.